Top 10 (Base 12) Country Western Song Titles

10.  How Can I Miss You If You Won’t Go Away?

B.   It’s Hard to Kiss the Lips at Night, That Chewed Your Ass Out All Day Long.

A.  I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim’s Getting Better

9,  I Wouldn’t Take Her to a Dogfight, ‘Cause I’m Afraid She’d Win.

8.  If I Can’t Be Number One in your Life, then Number Two on You!

7.  I’m So Miserable Without You, it’s like You’re Still Here.

6.  If I Had Shot You When I First Wanted To, I’d be out of Prison By Now.

5. I Liked You Better Before I Got to Know You So Well.

4.  You’re the Reason Our Kids are So Ugly.

3.  My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend and I Sure Do Miss Him.

2.  She Got the Ring, and I Got the Finger.

(And my own personal favorite . . .)

1. If the Phone Don’t Ring, You’ll Know It’s Me.