All quotes taken from The Guinness Book of Poisonous Quotes compiled by Colin Jarman (Contemporary Books)

• In California, they don’t throw their garbage away – they make it into TV shows.  Woody Allen

• Beethoven’s last quartets were written by a deaf man and should only be listened to by a deaf man.   Sir Thomas Beecham

• Don’t stay away from church because there are so many hypocrites.  There’s always room for one more.  A.R. Adams

• An Englishman will burn his bed to catch a flea.  Turkish proverb

From January, 2016:

• Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress, but I repeat myself.    Mark Twain

• He’s the kind of guy, who if you say “Hiya Clark, how are ya?,” he’s stuck for an answer.  Ava Gardner on Clark Gable.

• When an opera star sings her head off, she usually improves her appearance.  Victor Borge

• The best time I had with Joan Crawford was when I pushed her down the stairs in ‘Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?’  Bette Davis